Have you ever dropped your phone and watched in slow motion as it tumbled toward the ground? That split-second before impact, when you just know something is about to crack, is a lot like the moment trust is broken in a relationship. Whether it’s a friendship, a marriage, or a business partnership, when trust shatters, it can feel like there’s no way to put the pieces back together. But here’s the truth: just like your phone screen, trust can be repaired. It might take some work, but it often ends up stronger than before.
Trust isn’t Just Given; It’s Built (And Sometimes Rebuilt)
We often think of trust as something that should just exist in a relationship. We trust because we love, because we believe, because we want to trust. But, in reality, trust is a structure, built one small action at a time. And when it gets broken, it’s not about a grand gesture to fix it, but about rebuilding it with those same small actions, over and over again.
The good news? You don’t have to be perfect to be trustworthy. In fact, mistakes—if handled well—can actually deepen trust. It’s not about never dropping the ball; it’s about how you pick it back up.
So, You Messed Up. Now What?
First things first: take responsibility. Nothing makes repairing trust harder than defensiveness, excuses, or shifting blame. It might sting, but owning up to your actions is a gift, and not just to the other person but to yourself. Admitting “I hurt you, and I’m sorry” isn’t weakness; it’s strength.
Next, listen. And not just with the intention of responding, but really hear what the other person is saying. Trust breaks in a moment, but healing happens over time, and that time often starts with an honest conversation where both people feel heard.
Trust is in the Small Things
We love the idea of big, sweeping gestures, but the reality is that trust is built in the little moments: showing up when you said you would, keeping small promises, following through on what you say.
Think of trust like a jar of marbles. Every time you act in a way that aligns with honesty, reliability, and care, you add a marble. When trust is broken, it’s like marbles are taken out or the jar gets knocked over. The key isn’t trying to refill it all at once, but adding one marble at a time, consistently. Eventually, the jar is full again.
When You’re the One Who was Hurt
If you’re on the other side—if someone let you down—you have a choice: to hold onto the pain or to begin the process of healing. Forgiveness doesn’t mean forgetting or pretending it didn’t happen. It means making the conscious choice to release resentment so you can move forward.
It also means setting clear expectations. If you’ve been hurt, it’s okay to say, “This is what I need to rebuild trust.” That’s not punishment; that’s healthy boundaries.
Keep It Real
Trust isn’t about perfection. It’s about consistency. It’s about being honest even when it’s uncomfortable. It’s about showing up even when it’s hard. And sometimes, it’s about laughing at ourselves when we realize we aren’t as smooth as we thought we were.
We had a fantastic conversation about this on our latest podcast episode, sharing real-life stories of trust, mishaps, and what it really takes to repair relationships. If you’ve ever been in a situation where trust was on shaky ground (and honestly, who hasn’t?), you won’t want to miss this one.
You’ve Got This!
If you’ve messed up, there’s hope. If you’ve been hurt, there’s healing. Trust is a dance of giving and receiving, learning and growing. And sometimes, it’s about admitting you dropped the phone, picking up the pieces, and doing the work to put it back together.
So, go ahead and take the next step, one marble at a time. Your relationships are worth it, and so are you.
