I had waited many years for this conversation and this opportunity as I sat with my daughter this evening. She was awaiting the birth of her first child. How I loved this girl! She was flesh of my flesh and owned a piece of my heart she could never reclaim no matter who she was or what she did or did not do. Nevertheless, we were very different, and even though she was raised in our home, the way she saw and approached the world was very different from me. We often experienced clashes in communication and misunderstandings through the years that cut deep at times and created chasms between us. There were still bridges of love between us, and here I was with her to support her as she welcomed her first baby.
I had heard S. Michael Wilcox speak of seeking an answer to a pressing question and having to wait for years to receive it. The spirit prompted that the answer could come when it did because he finally had a “holding place” for that answer. And the answer I wanted my daughter to understand I felt she finally had the “holding space” to hear. So in the quiet of the evening, I asked her how she felt about this little boy she carried. She expressed with emotion how much she loved him. I asked her why? What had he done to deserve her love? And when he finally arrives, he will need her to meet his every need and take all her time and attention. So why did she love him? She expressed that she just did. She loved him because he existed and he was her child. There it was… and I quietly said to her, “that is how I feel about you. I deeply love you just because you exist and you are my child. There is nothing you can do or not do to change that.” Tears ran down her cheeks as this truth settled upon her. It was no longer just knowledge held in her mind but a knowing settling deep within her heart. In that moment, another truth also settled in her heart. She felt the love of her Heavenly Parents. Another truth was affirmed that she was loved by them no matter who she was or what she did or did not do because she was also their divine daughter.
There are so many messages in our world today telling us who we are or are not, or who we should or shouldn’t be. But the first and foremost message we need to know for ourselves is that we are divinely and deeply loved just for existing.
This message often gets lost in the noise of the temporal world and the experiences of our life. Sometimes we need to dig deep to find it again. Today I invite you to do just that. Remember a time you felt the awe and deep love for a child not because they did anything to deserve it but because they existed. Can you then look in the mirror and offer yourself that kind of love? If you cannot, can you begin today to pray to know how your Heavenly Father feels about you?
I once had a client that did this and came back with a message that she was not loved and her Heavenly Parents were disappointed in her. This message is a lie of this world and the God of this world (Satan) not the True and Living God: The God of your divine self. Step out of those lies and step into the awe and love you may have felt for a newborn baby or the delight in a newborn kitten. Spend some time looking through your life, getting in touch with a memory, or even the possibility that it could be true. Create a holding space for you to know in your mind and in your heart of your great value and worth just because you exist!
Our doings show what we desire, and God will always honor the desire of our hearts. We will talk more about this in the next blog. But for today, come to know for yourself or at least begin to create a holding space. As Oscar Wilde beautifully said, “To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance.” You cannot give to another what you do not have. Therefore, you cannot truly love another until you can look in the mirror and love yourself. Embrace the awe and love you’ve felt for others, and extend that same compassion and acceptance to yourself. This is where true self-love begins, paving the way for genuine love and connection with others.
